Top 3 Red Flags on a First Date

With The Bachelor back in full swing, singletons everywhere are questioning their own experiences in the dating world. How can I make the most of my next date so it can possibly bloom into something more? Are there red flags to look out for on a first date? Luckily, Justin Lavelle, Communications Director at BeenVerified online background check platform, has must-know tips for daters everywhere. With the help of The Bachelor, Justin has insight on how not to act on a first date and, more importantly, how to best proceed when encountering such behaviors among your dates.

The first few episodes, when a gaggle of attractive women are introduced to the eligible young man (played this season by Ben Higgins) and go on rounds of large group dates, tend to be very entertaining and talked about for the entire season. While each collection of eligible singles are distinct, it seems certain themes bubble up perennially on the show, now in its 20th season.

For example, some candidates for The Bachelor’s affection will prove to be too pushy, others too shy, while others, thanks to the generous portions of free alcohol, will simply get smashed.  We are already seeing these themes play out with Lace drinking too much and exhibiting signs of being “crazy” and Olivia’s aggressive behaviors making her the likely “most hated” girl among the other Bachelorettes this season.  We will see if these Bachelorettes can redeem themselves or just make matters worse tonight!

While The Bachelor is great entertainment, you actually can learn something from it, too. This time of year tends to bring out the dater in many single people, with the ranks of online dating sites swelling in January. And that means a lot of first dates across America.

While you may not have the opportunity to go on quite as many first dates as Ben will over the next couple of months, the behavior of a number of his potential matches can teach you some key things about how not to act on a first date and more importantly, to determine how best to proceed when encountering such behaviors among your dates.

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So with the help of The Bachelor, here are the top three red flags to watch out for on a first date:

Your date wants to kiss right away

While some open people may welcome such an act, a kiss on the lips on a first date, especially before the date has actually started, is rarely a good idea. It communicates an aggressiveness that the average person will find bewildering at best and beyond offensive at worst. The receiver of the kiss may question the kisser’s values or even sanity. This is not a good way to start a date that is not being televised for a national audience.

Your date gets drunk

An inability to remain sober on a first date may indicate a number of things, and none of them are good. It could indicate poor judgment, disrespect for the person you are out with, or even a serious drinking problem. Heavy drinking on a first date can also put both parties’ safety at risk. A first date is designed to be an introduction and for two people to get to know one another. Save that bar crawl for your first anniversary.

Your date makes demands on you

If at any point on the first date you encounter complaints, demands or overall negativity, treat this as a red flag. If your date can’t hide a negative attitude for a couple hours on a first date, what will it be like when he or she is actually comfortable with you? A living hell, that’s what.

It may be tempting to ignore red flags such as these, as Ben already has. When you are dating with the purpose of finding a soul mate to “complete” you, you may be willing to ignore some early negative signs and see how things develop. Our advice is steadfast: for healthy relationships, don’t ignore your intuition.

Top Tool for Daters: the BeenVerified Online Background Check Platform

In 2013, BeenVerified was named one of the fasted growing private companies in New York and the 26th  fastest growing privately held company in the nation. They currently have the 5th highest grossing utility app on iPhone, downloaded over 5,000,000 times. Their mission is to “help people discover, understand and use public data in their everyday lives” from planning family reunions to protecting their family from sex offenders, to checking the identities of those you interact with online. A must-have for daters, BeenVerified offers you unlimited searches and more available data without extra costs.